Thursday, January 29, 2009

CutTheCosby back and Reveamped on Monday (I mean Monday like the day of the week)



Hola (prounounced Ho-la, and means welcome in spanish) CutTheCosby will be back on Monday in full force (Edit: Medium Force) on Sunday after I am done making posts on FunnyOrDie.com! Until them, Please check out my blogs on Funny or die.com: Here is what I posted today (Please don't hurt me or my friends):


Hey cool cats, lets mellow out today and talk a little about real singing chops! Cats, approach me on the street all the time and say, “Hey Marty what’s the deal with those Pro-Chops of yours?” Well the answer is simple, PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE! (Edit: I always try my best! Like when I HAVE to do Tiger Schulman’s Karate because my parents pay for it. I can’t wait until summer sessions. I’ll do crescent kicks in showcases and scream Kee-Yai to focus my Strikes!)

There are few things as important in today’s struggling music industry as having real solid professional-grade chops (I try my best!). And I’m not razzin you jive poppies, it takes hard work and good moola to build up your chops correctly (This is a blog). All this advice isn’t coming from just anyone, if you ask around in local Jazz circuits, they call me “The Kitten Boy“ because I can be very timid (but like a kitten I never give up!). There are days I feel like singing until my voice is hoarse and oftentimes, depending on the groove, I believe I need to challenge myself with more difficult runs.
For beginners, when you’re building chops up, you’re going to want to start slow. There’s nothing worse than thinking you have Grade-A Chops only to find out, that your chops are all loosey goosey. I’ve seen many people, try to hit a high vibrato (For example, a standard “Skee Bop Ska Bow“ vocal run.), at full capacity, and the next thing you know they’ve completely blown out their chops (what is this amateur howser?) Like Local Pro Jazz Buff, Marty “Tucan” Janetti says, “When Jazz makes it comeback, I will rent my own apartment!.”

I know I make it look easy but I didn’t always have these Pro-Chops, at first I had limited to no Chops. then at the advice of my dad, I started workin’ it. I remember him coming into my room every night right before bed and telling me, “Marty, It may seem hard now but really work those chops!” (I think I may be bleeding and I will check!) The next thing you know I’m belting out mellow jazz tunes like Brown Eyes Grill and the song The Black Eyed Peas.
Easy Instructions to start building up your Chops. Warning Building your chops can be a very long difficult process and is not recommended for beginners.

Step1: “Open your mouth wide and make an “O” sound until you really feel like you have good chops. And that’s all it takes you know have full chops!

1 comment:

  1. Cobra-kai feels like sparring with your chops... Marty-san. cellphone on..cellphone off

    This Crack-a-lackin' sad-sack gets all higglidy-piggildy and googley-eyed when some hep-beatnik-a-rooney-o gives up some ice-cold hot licks on his/her licorace stick.
    Game on...(move net now)

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