Saturday, December 27, 2008

Financial Advice

Hi CutTheCosby Reader, this is the second post of my financial blog with cool tips on saving cash and making moola (means money LOL)! I hope I never die. In this edition of Financial Advice I will beg for your money! I'm scared I can be homeless one days and people will take my things (Ex: Like hat or shoes). I hope you can give me 400 or 500 dollars because of charity. Please I need it for new investments and car payments, and if you don't give it to me I will be upset :(

Update (12/28/08): My Dog is fun and loves to be pet! What if he was hungry one day and bought a snack (Imagine?)

I want at least 400 but you can give more because of charity (Help me please, what if I get sick?). Cash is okay but credit cards is ok! To give credit cards post your credit card info (information) in the comments section and I will take what I think is fair (I will judge by fairness). I hope you give me at least 400 dollars! This investment is a lock! Please, don't take my hat or shoes! You are thinking, "Sure Mart, I will loan you anything but what is the catch?" That's the thing! There is no catch! You give me my money and I spend it on things I like, like shoes, hats or dog medication (My dogs are healthy boys, but I stock up for safety)! You can even give suggestions on what to do with my money (Note: No suggestions will be considered). I saw a Program called "The Family Matters" and one character named Steve Urelle said, "Did I do that?" (And he did do it! LOL!) There was a blood drive and I said, I would like to buy all the blood in case I need it (LOL)! Some people may say "What the heck?" To them I say Like Nikey sayed "Just do it!" Remember me thinking, I don't need it but I want it, well this is the time.


Please hurry and do it quickly because I am scared of the economy and I want to make sure I am safety! I'll do anything, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.


Remember: Be Self Relient, be responsible for yourself, Never give up and be a hero!


I want you to help me in case I have hard times!


Friday, December 26, 2008

Television Reviews: Home Improvements

Talk about a hot new sitcom! This Reviewer went bananas when he first saw Home Improvements! I turned it on and said I hope I get the jokes and it turned out I got many of them (not all)!


Home Improvements is a show about a man named Jim Taylor and he is a Toolman. This is what I get of the jokes. And believe me my sides were hurting. Just think a whole show about a Toolman, what fun? When my mother told me the show wasn't real I cried because the belief was so much fun!


Jim gets hurt doing pranks at work and his assistant Al Borand says, "I don't think so Jim". My Dad says to me, "Turn off that program!" But I say "No Way Dad, This show is a fun escape!" Later in the program his mom Jill says, "Tim, it is the Christmas Pagent!" And Tim does this noise, "Ar Ar Ar, I'm the Toolman." This part I do not get. What is wrong with the toolman's throat? I hope we find out in later episodes.


Wilson is Jim's friend that gives him cool tips on how to solve his fears! In my life wilson is like my dog (What a day)! They don't say it but you can tell Jim is scared of Wilson hurting his friends and loved ones. But cool out and enjoy a soda pop because it doesn't happen! Jim works on a program called Toon Time! This is another part of the show. I hope no one is hurt and other people get the jokes like me (I'm sorry if anyone lost someone. I honor their death!)!


This is my review of Tool Time with Jim Taylor. I hope I enjoyed it. Please be yourself! I'm scared and hope Tim and his family are safe for many years to come!


(If I ruined anyones belief that the show was not real I sincerely apologize, but the truth hurts, go out and enjoy the day!)


Audio World Exclusive (Kenny Wests Cover)

video

PRESS PLAY TO HEAR MARTY PONCHO'S OFFICIAL GOOD LIFE (REMIX) Featuring Barry B. No affiliation with the original (Good Life by Kenny Wests.)

Monday, December 22, 2008

Holiday Photos

Happy Holidays From All of us At CutTheCosby.Blogspot.Com! I will treat you with these Holiday Snapshots from Sears Department Stores. I was happy with my Photograph experience but scared. I pray on my Friend's Graves that I was not swindled out of my money. I pray your families have a very Happpy Holidays. Thankyou and Please stay away from my family!






On this holiday season, may warmth fill your heart, Love fill your soul and may your minds not be filled with violent thoughts about harming my loved ones!

Coming Soon To CUTTHECOSBY

1. Music!
2. Art
3. Suggestions on how to not hurt my family.
4. Relationship Advice
5. Not Hurting My dogs
6. Job Listings and information
7. Internet
8. Religion Advice
9. My dad's new column on splitting up with my mother
10. Wacky Animal Pics (Note: Some pics may be wacky and others silly, I apologize if this offends any)


Movie Review: Saving Private Ryan (**NO SPOILERS**)

Hello and Family Safety To all! Earlier today I rented the 1998 comedy romp Saving Private Ryan! Although the film was listed as a comedy on the box, I found myself struggling to get a lot of the jokes and questioning the film's direction. This oddball comedy opens up with the men storming the Normandy Beach all clowning around and doing army jokes! (My friends are cool, I have one friend who is tall and one friend who is short we call them the Brady Bunch! LOL!)

The story is of the Ryan Family and 3 of the 4 Ryan brothers have died in the army in different funny ways. The story is of the wacky John H. Miller (Played by Jon Hanks) who is trying to save the other brother (who is alive) and the jokes that get John out of it. I didn't understand some of the jokes because some of it was dark humor and over my head. For example, I didn't get the joke in the ending scene of Captain Miller dying after rescuing Private Ryan and Private Ryan feeling upset because his friend was killed. (I kind of got the joke, but was that supposed to be very funny? This is NOT Wedding Crashers)

Although much of the comedy missed the mark for my tastes, there were definitely parts had me rolling in the aisle! I couldn't control my laughter in the scene in which the family is at the War Memorial mourning their sons deaths and one of the family members has a look on there face that tottally said, "Get me outta here, I just want a slice of pizza pie!" (LOL that will be in my mind for weeks! Think: Wedding Crashers but funnier!) I reccomend the movie to anyone who is in the mood for a Dark Comedy, that will cause even the most serious viewer (like this blogger) to break up with laughs!

As far as the acting was concerned, I liked how they were trying to save the Ryan Family and I got that joke! They were like Champions in that part! But I didn't like the look John Hanks had in his eyes the entire movie. Almost looking at the viewer and challenging them saying, "You're family is next to die, unless you protect them!" I didn't get all of the killing jokes but I got many of them. So Get your Popcorn and grab your tissues because if you're anything like this blogger at some parts you will laugh yourself to tears! And Today I will use the right Deoderant (Right Pop Pop?) Eventhough I didn't quite get some of the jokes I rate this 3 out of 3 safe families Up!







EDIT: I CANNOT EXPRES HOW SORRY I AM! I NOW REALIZE THE MOVIE WASN'T INTENDED AS A COMEDY. I AM TERRIBLY SORRY AND ASHAMED FOR MY IGNORANCE. MY FRIENDS ARE COOL. THERE WAS AN ERROR ON THE BOX OF MY TAPE. I PRAY FOR THE FORGIVNESS OF THOSE I'VE UNINTENTIONALLY OFFENDED (LOL). PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS OUT ON MY FAMILY!!! I HAVE SINCE VOICED MY OUTRAGE TO BLOCKBUSTER! WITH PEACE AND LOVE MARTY P.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Electronics: Week 1

Once I purchased it at the local Electronics Distributor (It's called Radio Shack but I always call it Radio C-Cuss that rhymes with Wrap! (Use your imgination for what cuss I mean (Edit for clarity: I mean Cr@p) (Edit : Like Radio Crap instead of Radio Shack), I couldn't wait to blog about my new Personal Computer by Apple Computers and Electronics?

I love to enjoy walking around the store and watching all the cool Electronics, it's like being in outer space! When the salesman told me the word cutting edge, I immediatly became nervous because of the imagery. I knew he was nice but I had to restrain myself from accusing him of being a liar. Salesman lie to you and they try to steal your money. They're all cheats, out to harm you and take your things. I'm sorry Pop Pop for your old age!

I spent a reasonable price and all in all had a fun time looking at the new electronics in stock. I hope my time away from home was fun for me, and I hope I do not cut myself later. I'm ready for anything! ANDDD REMEMBER GO GO GADGETS (Because we are talking about Computers!)

My New P.C. (Edit: P.C. stands for Personal Computer):


I apoligize for anyone offended by my use of the C-Cuss, but Radio Shack can be such Dumbos (apologies for use of the phrase Dumbos). Happy and Safe Families to All!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Food Reviews: Dominoe's Pizzeria

Today I was inspired to get pizza pies so I decided to call up Domino's Pizzeria! Talk about quick delivery! It was barely 25 minutes in between the time I called up and the time I was screaming at the delivery boy to get off my property! Now, that's fast and tasty food! I am typing to you guys on the internet! This is my website http://www.cutthecosby.blogspot.com/! My only complaint is the threatening tone the woman used when I refused to repeat my address for safety reasons! For this reason I give Dominoe's 3 out of 3 Safe Family's Up! Happy Pizzeria Everyone !

REMINDER: Tonight is a full moon! This occurrence only happens twice every month, I'm watching from 9-11 pm!

Email (Electronic Mail) Me for more info







Friday, December 19, 2008

Music Reviews: Raffi's Christmas Album

Just when I thought it couldn't get any better than ICP, Raffi comes along and knocks my block off with an epic new cd full of hit! This Christian Bohemeth has become more Goliath than David if you know what I mean (I hope this doesn't offend any Christians, I've admired your customs for years. I love when you guys eat communion! It's the absolute coolest to watch!).



Let me say, this album was a pure treat of the ears! I felt like I was on fire with magic! Raffi's Christmas Album, delivers a CD that this reviewer would without hesitation put along side albums like Menudo "Reaching out", Meat Loaf "Dead Ringer" and Eddie Murphy's "Love's Alright" as my top all time albums. The album starts slow, with Frosty the Snowman but builds to a heinous crescendo of sound with Petit Papa Noel at track 4. So far I have listened that far.

I rate this Album with my hightest rating of 5 out of 5: Everyone I know and love is Safe's!
Thank's raffi for bringing back quality music.


Current Events: Olympics

The 2008 Olympics will be held in Beiijing China! American,Michael Phelps is going for an unprecedented 5 gold medals. I hope he wins most of them, but not all because it's not fair to the other Olympians. I pray no one is hurt.

We can all watch them at my house! I will supply the chips and dip, you guys supply the company. I am not sure when they start but I do have a television to watch them on! Can't wait to see Americans be champions of the world! Don't hurt my dogs!

Anyone with info on the Starting Date/Time Email (abbreviation for Electronic Mail) Me

All are welcome to watch! EMail (abbreviaton for Electronic Mail) me for invites! Everyone can come unless you are dirty!

Cool Trends: Week 1

This week I'll be chatting about roller blading. I bought a new pair of blades this weekend and I plan to tear up the beach. I'm looking forward to grinding. It's very important that you stretch first before you blade. I know what you're thinking. Hey, how are we all going to blade? Don't worry I gotcha covered. I bought 3 pairs of blades. I know what you're thinking,how are we all going to blade? Well if we all switch off, everyone will get a fair chance to blade and we'll still all have fun. I can feel the fun already! Who's with me? If we get to the beach by 9am we can beat the traffic and still all get chances to blade. Everyone gets at least 10 minutes on the blades. I have my own pair and will be blading and instructing the entire time! My parents said they can be there to supervise. I hope I don't die alone.


ALL ARE WELCOME. Email me for more info.



Current Events: Barracth Obama Elected President!

For those of you who haven't heard the news, there is a new President in town and his name isn't George W. Bush. His name is Barractch Obama and he is for Change! I heard about this news yesterday, December 18th when I was talking to my brother and I said I think America is ready for change. Then my brother told me, guess what, there is a change! His name is Barratch Obama and he is a Democras! And he was elected so the country can conquer our demons be champions!

My brother told me he is Afros-American and I am not sure but I THINK he is America's first Afros-American President (I will fact check and update)!! I said I don't care it doesn't bother me what color he is as long as he can make this country a SLAM DUNK! Well Baratch, I hope you do a better job than this last Candidate because he really stunk (I will fact check and update)!

I am happy he is election and I hope he wins all the elected!



Stock Tips

Although I have no formal training I have been known to have great stock tips and advice so heeeere are the tips! The market is strong right so you're going to want to invest. Please be safe and I hope everyone's parents and family are safe as well!

Here's are some safe bets:

Hollywood Video
Sharper Image
Performance Team Freight
Linens n Things
Circuit City

If you're smart you'll want to buy in now when the market is soaring. My advisor said invest in everything because there's virtually no risk. Well I bet you're saying it's easy for you to say put yours moneyk where your mouth is! Well, I personally just invested 6,000 dollars and bought a thousand shares of Hollywood Video (safe bet because everyone needs Tapes) and 400 shares of Sharper Image (safe bet because they have quirky cool gifts). I think they will both be good picks! If you do invest your money, I hope that everyone is having a fun day (because that's how they get you)!

So if you need some guaranteed extra cash play the stocks!

And remember: Everyone Wins at Stocks!





Pump it Up for Physical Fitness!

Today, I started pumping iron at the gymnasium! I couldn't believe how satisfying it felt to be at the gymnasium! I did 130 pounds for three reps on bench! Then it was time for Lats. I did 20 pounds on Lats. Then it was time to blast the legs. I did 50 pounds on legs. But then it was time for strectching. I did 30 minutes of stretching and I thought it was a good first day at the gym. I came home and my mother said, Mark why are you so tired and I said cause I basically just blasted all my core muscle groups Mom! When you do workouts you have to make sure you can't die. This was a scary part for me but I pushed through it and lived! I hope everyone loves my parents! Then I ate a big bowl of Ravioli to carboload for tommorrow where I am going to work my neck and calves! This is where we separate the Men from the boys! I have the coolest parents!













Thursday, December 18, 2008

Food Reviews: Mexicano!

Today I had the pleasure of sampling a quaint Mexicano Restaurant located on a main road in a small town in New York. The staff was delightful, and the food was good to boot! I've never been so happy as to have enjoyed the company of this amazing staff and it's more amazing patrons. I've never been so pleased to wait for my food! Waiting I might as well have called it AMAZING! My waitress was named Llana, we had a nice conversation about her hometown of Valencia and staying away from my family. I ordered two chicken quesadillas, and she offered me a free app! I was so happy! I ordered the Nachos with Cheese and I begged her to not hurt me or anyone I knew. The 2 Quesadillas were sensational! I rate this restaurant with my first rating ever of: 3 Safe Families Up! I love you Mom and Dad and I don't know what I'd do without you! Please Stay away from them!

The Food was so good, I immediatly told all my friends about it! So they can enjoy the same way that I can enjoy (WITH VIGOR! RIGHT GUYS?!?! BREW CREW 4 EVA!). I ate the food kind of
fast, so I hope I don't get Hepititus. This is another concern. Thankyou for reading my blog. Please bless my family with super protection!






Season's Greetings To All !

It's time to spread a little holiday cheer! I personally made these E-CARDS for all you bloggers out there! I am Half Jewish and Half Christmas so Decembre is busy like fun! The cards represent how the holidays make me feel! Bless Your loved ones and make them Bless me (for fairness)! Please have a happy holidus season and happy new Years?






Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Jokes: Clean Jokes and Funny Pictures!

Clean original jokes to tell for the office or workspace or workspace!!
(Feel free to post on your own blogs but Please be respectfud and give credit if used):

1. What do tacos and quesadillas have in common? Cheese!

1. What's the difference between a book worm and a book? Running! (I'm very sorry if this offended anyone, it wasn't my intention. But lighten up it's just a jokes!)

2. This is why YOU KNOW God is a man! Because there is sports on Sunday games!!!

3. There is a man who says, "here’s a Tip: Save time by hitting the return key instead of clicking on search in the google tool bar. I hope I'm not kidnapped!

4. What do you say to a man who is tired? Please sir, don't hurt my family

%. Have you heard of trains? Better stay out of their way or they'll KNOCK YA BLOCK OFF!

5. Man: And then I made my life worth the time!

Horse: Why even bother, it's only my birthday!


6. My Uncle Does Karate. He also might have liver problems.


7. Where do dogs go when they




FunPics for work:

Blog Post

I am finally blogging! Who would have thought Me? Blogging I can't believe it! I'm part of the web! That's what happens when you blog you get to talk about it on the world wide wez! But who would have thought me? Blogging! Right here on the wed! It's like Neitzshe said, If you can't blog you might as well do sandwiches! And that's time most today(right guys?)!


Thankyou for my friends God, and thankyou for the Earth! I pray that my mind doesn't make me lock my backyard gates over and over again! I hate it when it does that! Just Joshin, God can sure work in mysteries! (Soda is nice, get me?) Sometimes you find yourself have to question that guy (or gal who knows? right guys?)!


It's me! Posting right here on the world wize web...I hope no one kills my family! Sometimes I eat pasta and sometimes my parents get divorced! What a beautiful world we live in!!!