Sunday, March 6, 2011
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Submissions will be accepted no later than 9/10/09
Thankyou in advance,
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Easy Instructions to start building up your Chops. Warning Building your chops can be a very long difficult process and is not recommended for beginners.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
I am a little Antsy because I have to be a fun ;) So since I have to be a so much fun there is only one thing to do! And that is Dairy Day! For those of you who don't know; what you do for dairy day is buy Milkand Cheese and only eat them until you are scared you may perish (I am strong like a lion!). This is where the fun begins! Now you buy more Cheese and Milk and call your parents! When they are over you say to them, "Mommy or Poppy (whoever it is) Help me I've had too much Milk and cheese! This Dairy Day has gone totally haywire!"
Then you should go to the hospital because that is much Milke and Cheese. I wish everyday was Dairy Day. I want to buy a car and say look at me because Fonzy, "Ayyyyy" (Like on the program Happiest Days by The Fonz) But good thing today is! I celebrate Dairy Day alone in my room crying by eating Milk and Cheese! I am total worthless trash!
Edit: Dairy Day is not for everyone. Please enjoy your day (That's what she said LOL)!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Verse 1 (Mediocre Chops):
I will be the World's Greatest Champion
I hope I do not Die in a Car Accident
I will be the World's Greatest Champion
I Beg you Please don't kill my family
This song isn't as good as Batman Returns
But I hope it is as good as Batman Begins
Chorus (Building Chops):
My Father is a Champion
My Mother is a Champion
My Brother is a Champion
Please Don't take my things
This is the chorus
Don't worry you have to remember this is not happening to you
It is just a song
Verse 2 (Full Chops):
Mommy said Marty You will be a Champion
Daddy said Marty You will be a hero
I am scared I will bleed from my kidneys
I am hopeful that I won't
This is the greatest story ever told
And my favorite Movie is Batman Returns
Believe in your heart
Never Give up in your dreams (Never)
Never rush through work
Bridge (Chop Decrease and then on to Full Chops):
I am the World's Greatest Champion
I feel the joy inside my heart
I am a champion like Michael Keaton in Batman Returns
Remember Popcorn Safety from earlier in the song
And you too can be a Champion.Chorus (Light Chops).
End (Chops Diminished) .
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
YOU HAVE TO KNOW THE WILDERNESS. ONCE YOU BEGIN TO KNOW NATURE YOU CAN BEGIN TO KNOW YOURSELF. GUESS WHAT DAVID THAT MONEY YOU OWE US FOR THE THE ABOVE GROUND POOL NEVER CAME. BIG SURPRISE. I NEED THAT MONEY DAVID IF WE DON'T GET IT WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM. I WANT MY CARIBEANERS WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO ROLL OVER AND DIE. I HOPE ALL IS WELL WITH THE FAMILY HAVE A GOOD HOLIDAY SEASON. TIME TO PRACTICE IMAGINING THAT I CLIMB ON MOUNTAINS.
Monday, January 19, 2009
I am sorry if I cannot update all the days but I will update some. This is my first post since having a job. No one reads my blog and I am scared I am losing life force, please visit my site and please love your life because you never no when someone is trying to take steps to put you or your family in serious danger.
Friday, January 16, 2009
I'm sorry if I failed you at this.
Please don't harm me or my friends
All the "Boob Man" shirts and hats are still available. Read Below for further details.
In the mean time:
There is official new Specialized CutTheCosby-Gear (hats and shirts) on sale immeidatly in the online store! These specialized hats and shirts are perfect for work, business and casual. And each hat and shirt screams the spirit of CutTheCosby both business and casual. Trust me buddy, I am now selling these hats and shirts full time because it is a total lock. All of the shirts and hats are high quality 100% cotton and come in sizes: Medium.
You can never have just one shirts and hats and they are perfect for all occassions but i'll make a special deal for you. For you, there is a Grand opening sale starting today in which every CutTheCosby item you buy only costs 20 dollars each (plus 15 dollars shipping. Minimum order of 3 hats or shirts per purchase)! At these prices you are stealing from me and I will deliver them to you personally (Price does not include gas money).
All items are available in Medium:
These Boob Man shirts and Hats are made from 100% cotton perfect for any season or occasion. Trust me buddy, be the first one you know to have one (I need this). Boob Man hats and shirts are 100% Cotton and are available in sizes: Medium. Listen in a few weeks you are going to say to me, "Marty I want to be one of the Boob Men?" (Each order must include a Minimum of three hats or shirts or a combination of one hat and two shirts)
To order place your adress and credit card information in the Comment section and I will charge your account (fairly) deliver them to you personally.
I have a strange feeling, "Boob Man" Hats and Shirts are going to be this years "It" item."
"I bought a combination of one hat and two shirts and they are cool! Don't call me at work anymore."- -Mom
"I bought 3 shirts and they are good but not great!"-- Dad
"I bought a combination of one hat and two shirts and now I am one of the Boob Men" --Brother
There is a a Limited amount available. Be one of the first 5,000 people to order and recieve a "Boob Man" key chain (for 4.00$)!
Boob Man Posters and Cups and mouse pads will soon be available.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
From Marty P. (Super Webmaster)
**Ladies and Gents is short for Ladies and Gentlemen. Get your boards and let's GRIND on the HALF PIPES! I am a Star and I will shine so bright! Because Magic camp only lasts a week and then you are out on your keister with your tricks and you only have your confidence!
Monday, January 12, 2009
This film was awesome and missed the mark! It gets 3 out of 3 safe families up!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Friday, January 9, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
What the Heck Uncle David? Dad said, you're a sloppy waste! Tell me the answer to this question in the comment section: What the Heck? I can watch TV or read the newspaper. Sometimes if you use your brain it's like a video game with high scores and guitar hero that is letting you live your life (right guys?). I watch Television Programs and read the New York Times and I am slowly gaining power.
Hey guys, I hope no one hurts me or tries to steal my things! I hope this makes it to the internet (this is my wish)! My brain is the best I can't do without it! My brain stinks, get it out of here dumbo! Have you seen the show King of the Hill? They are all Kings of the Hill I think (but maybe not). My biggest complaint is on one episode, The King of the Hill Hank Hills says, "Bobby What the heck?" and I hate that joke (It is like Wedding Crashers but Better!)
There is a book called "The Celestine Prophecy" because on King of the Hill they (The Kings of the Hill all) say, "Hey can I have more beers?" I think they always say this but I am not sure (Edit: They do not say this). In the Celestine Prophecy they teach you to be magic and don't threaten your family or their safety (this is a plus). The book is a page turner but WARNING: THE STORY IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING TO YOU, YOU ARE ONLY READING IT. I like how they try to run your life but I don't like how they hint at hurting your family (this is unacceptable). I will finish reading it when I have time.
I hope everyone is having a great Summer! Marty P.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Sunday, January 4, 2009
1. Stop Wars: I think it will be very hard at first but then people will see how much better the world is without the wars and they will say this, "Oh boy, I admit it we were acting silly before! We shouldn't have been so silly and murdered! I think that is where we made our errors but I am not sure!" (Edit: I make things from scratch like birdhouses, E-mail (electronic mail) Me for more Info).
2. Stop Bad Thoughts: This is important but not very because I think you get it. If you don't have bad thoughts you will be happy! A cool way I try remember this is, anytime I think of violence, I think to myself, "Stop Mart, that's bad, lay off those thoughts for a while", and that helps me stop the thoughts. My therapist Linda Jenson also gave a good tip, she said, if that doesn't work try to snap a rubberband on your wrist to "snap you out of the bad thoughts"! It's not easy to quit all at once so don't get worried! (Like many in their twenties, I have a habbit of ripping out my hair when I get worried, but I am learning to do it less and now you can barely tell! :) :) :)
3. Staying Away from my Family: This is one is essential. There can Be no Peace unless everyone agrees that they will not harm me or my family. Unfortunately this is an issue that I cannot budge on. DON'T TOUCH MY THINGS! There is no middle ground on this. Please Stay away from my family and loved ones.
Editor's Note: This three pronged attack at world peace is for all but if this plan is used for World peace please give me credit.
Peace and Love! Stay away from my family!
Saturday, January 3, 2009
When it comes to women let me ask you this qeustion? Do you know about wholesale retailers? Well if you do, there is one that even you don't know about! It is a a little known store with Mega-Deals called Costcos! Please don't tell Costco I reviewed there store or they may sue me!
Costco's has it all! It has a electronics section, it has a clothing store and it even sells authentic Pizza's Fresh from the oven! (I went to space camp once and I bought a shirt there that said, "Spaced Out!" I had to leave early because I started bleeding from my eyes LOL!) Costco's is a cool store for anyone who likes to get sea food! I am allergic to crab but my doctor confirmed I am allowed eat lobster.
I'm worried people are going to cheat me out of my money and try to post my information on the internet. If you wish any ill on me I hope you choke on your own spit because I am a Champion (Please take care of yourself and do not get hurt by choking).
Costco has it all! It has it's own brand of jeans for trying on and modeling around the store (I buy Kirkland Brand Jeans because my parents won't let me wear my slacks yet)! They even has a cashier that says, " Hello Mart, you can pay for this in cash's or credits cards!" (I say back, "Cash for me, I'm scared of credit card's these days because of the economy! And they use them to track you and take your earnings!").
You will be saving so much money that you won't want to take your asthma medication (But please do, for safety)! I hope my Uncle will shut his fat stinking mouth about me! Now that you are a memeber you can go in to Costco, shop around, scope out the deals and be happy! Shut your stinking mouth Uncle David!
I love the Costco's and I love how they give you free samples (They are not for sale, but you can buy the products you test! BUT I NEVER DO!) I eat the products for free and then I always buy the products! It's like that new T.I. song says, "You can have whatever you want"! So enjoy the night scene and thank me when you are having all your new dates!
Friday, January 2, 2009
And this reviewer has just pooped this Casette into his tape player and has one thing to say: Now this is what I call music! I listened to it and I thought to myself boy, I might as well have died and gone to heaven ! And the songs are all top notch quality with over an hour of jamming cuts on just one tape!
Although there are some songs (most) that can be offensive to listen to, I believe all the artists meant well but just hate themselves inside. One of the more offensive songs is called "Where is the Love?" By the Black Eyes Peace and Justice Timberlakes! Where are my dogs at?!? (Note: I now believe my Dog Buddy tries to make number 2's in my room to teach me a lesson but I am on to him!) In the song Black Eyed Peace says: "Yo', whatever happened to the values of humanity? Whatever happened to the fairness in equality? Instead of spreading love we're spreading animosity."
The song is trashy garbage and I think it's unfair that he uses so much foul language. I don't understand what he means by the word "fairness" but I am trying to uncover it! The rest of the song is pure magic straight from the wizard's staff: KAPOW, ZAM and SHAZAM we are all a magics like Black Eyed Peace!
There are over 20 Chart topping hits! Some other legendary artists included are Nickel's Back and Chingy's! They all make their own statements and never cry in the songs which makes them champions! You will listen to some songs and say "Whoa Nelly! This songs a Whopper"! Please use your heart and stay away from my family!
Offensive or Not, there is no question about it, This Music is timeless?? My brother told me they have "Now That's what I call Music 29" available now but I am scared to stay current! I have many fears and they're all hurting my social life, please help. Released in late 2003 this CD has remained bubbling in New York's Hipster underground for long enough it is time to make it a hit! Now this is what I call Musec! And this is what I call, you staying away from my family!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Update (12/28/08): My Dog is fun and loves to be pet! What if he was hungry one day and bought a snack (Imagine?)
I want at least 400 but you can give more because of charity (Help me please, what if I get sick?). Cash is okay but credit cards is ok! To give credit cards post your credit card info (information) in the comments section and I will take what I think is fair (I will judge by fairness). I hope you give me at least 400 dollars! This investment is a lock! Please, don't take my hat or shoes! You are thinking, "Sure Mart, I will loan you anything but what is the catch?" That's the thing! There is no catch! You give me my money and I spend it on things I like, like shoes, hats or dog medication (My dogs are healthy boys, but I stock up for safety)! You can even give suggestions on what to do with my money (Note: No suggestions will be considered). I saw a Program called "The Family Matters" and one character named Steve Urelle said, "Did I do that?" (And he did do it! LOL!) There was a blood drive and I said, I would like to buy all the blood in case I need it (LOL)! Some people may say "What the heck?" To them I say Like Nikey sayed "Just do it!" Remember me thinking, I don't need it but I want it, well this is the time.
Please hurry and do it quickly because I am scared of the economy and I want to make sure I am safety! I'll do anything, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
Remember: Be Self Relient, be responsible for yourself, Never give up and be a hero!
I want you to help me in case I have hard times!
Friday, December 26, 2008
Home Improvements is a show about a man named Jim Taylor and he is a Toolman. This is what I get of the jokes. And believe me my sides were hurting. Just think a whole show about a Toolman, what fun? When my mother told me the show wasn't real I cried because the belief was so much fun!
Jim gets hurt doing pranks at work and his assistant Al Borand says, "I don't think so Jim". My Dad says to me, "Turn off that program!" But I say "No Way Dad, This show is a fun escape!" Later in the program his mom Jill says, "Tim, it is the Christmas Pagent!" And Tim does this noise, "Ar Ar Ar, I'm the Toolman." This part I do not get. What is wrong with the toolman's throat? I hope we find out in later episodes.
Wilson is Jim's friend that gives him cool tips on how to solve his fears! In my life wilson is like my dog (What a day)! They don't say it but you can tell Jim is scared of Wilson hurting his friends and loved ones. But cool out and enjoy a soda pop because it doesn't happen! Jim works on a program called Toon Time! This is another part of the show. I hope no one is hurt and other people get the jokes like me (I'm sorry if anyone lost someone. I honor their death!)!
This is my review of Tool Time with Jim Taylor. I hope I enjoyed it. Please be yourself! I'm scared and hope Tim and his family are safe for many years to come!
(If I ruined anyones belief that the show was not real I sincerely apologize, but the truth hurts, go out and enjoy the day!)
Monday, December 22, 2008
On this holiday season, may warmth fill your heart, Love fill your soul and may your minds not be filled with violent thoughts about harming my loved ones!
3. Suggestions on how to not hurt my family.
4. Relationship Advice
5. Not Hurting My dogs
6. Job Listings and information
8. Religion Advice
9. My dad's new column on splitting up with my mother
10. Wacky Animal Pics (Note: Some pics may be wacky and others silly, I apologize if this offends any)
The story is of the Ryan Family and 3 of the 4 Ryan brothers have died in the army in different funny ways. The story is of the wacky John H. Miller (Played by Jon Hanks) who is trying to save the other brother (who is alive) and the jokes that get John out of it. I didn't understand some of the jokes because some of it was dark humor and over my head. For example, I didn't get the joke in the ending scene of Captain Miller dying after rescuing Private Ryan and Private Ryan feeling upset because his friend was killed. (I kind of got the joke, but was that supposed to be very funny? This is NOT Wedding Crashers)
Although much of the comedy missed the mark for my tastes, there were definitely parts had me rolling in the aisle! I couldn't control my laughter in the scene in which the family is at the War Memorial mourning their sons deaths and one of the family members has a look on there face that tottally said, "Get me outta here, I just want a slice of pizza pie!" (LOL that will be in my mind for weeks! Think: Wedding Crashers but funnier!) I reccomend the movie to anyone who is in the mood for a Dark Comedy, that will cause even the most serious viewer (like this blogger) to break up with laughs!
As far as the acting was concerned, I liked how they were trying to save the Ryan Family and I got that joke! They were like Champions in that part! But I didn't like the look John Hanks had in his eyes the entire movie. Almost looking at the viewer and challenging them saying, "You're family is next to die, unless you protect them!" I didn't get all of the killing jokes but I got many of them. So Get your Popcorn and grab your tissues because if you're anything like this blogger at some parts you will laugh yourself to tears! And Today I will use the right Deoderant (Right Pop Pop?) Eventhough I didn't quite get some of the jokes I rate this 3 out of 3 safe families Up!
EDIT: I CANNOT EXPRES HOW SORRY I AM! I NOW REALIZE THE MOVIE WASN'T INTENDED AS A COMEDY. I AM TERRIBLY SORRY AND ASHAMED FOR MY IGNORANCE. MY FRIENDS ARE COOL. THERE WAS AN ERROR ON THE BOX OF MY TAPE. I PRAY FOR THE FORGIVNESS OF THOSE I'VE UNINTENTIONALLY OFFENDED (LOL). PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS OUT ON MY FAMILY!!! I HAVE SINCE VOICED MY OUTRAGE TO BLOCKBUSTER! WITH PEACE AND LOVE MARTY P.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
I love to enjoy walking around the store and watching all the cool Electronics, it's like being in outer space! When the salesman told me the word cutting edge, I immediatly became nervous because of the imagery. I knew he was nice but I had to restrain myself from accusing him of being a liar. Salesman lie to you and they try to steal your money. They're all cheats, out to harm you and take your things. I'm sorry Pop Pop for your old age!
I spent a reasonable price and all in all had a fun time looking at the new electronics in stock. I hope my time away from home was fun for me, and I hope I do not cut myself later. I'm ready for anything! ANDDD REMEMBER GO GO GADGETS (Because we are talking about Computers!)
My New P.C. (Edit: P.C. stands for Personal Computer):
I apoligize for anyone offended by my use of the C-Cuss, but Radio Shack can be such Dumbos (apologies for use of the phrase Dumbos). Happy and Safe Families to All!
Saturday, December 20, 2008
REMINDER: Tonight is a full moon! This occurrence only happens twice every month, I'm watching from 9-11 pm!
Email (Electronic Mail) Me for more info
Friday, December 19, 2008
We can all watch them at my house! I will supply the chips and dip, you guys supply the company. I am not sure when they start but I do have a television to watch them on! Can't wait to see Americans be champions of the world! Don't hurt my dogs!
Anyone with info on the Starting Date/Time Email (abbreviation for Electronic Mail) Me
All are welcome to watch! EMail (abbreviaton for Electronic Mail) me for invites! Everyone can come unless you are dirty!
ALL ARE WELCOME. Email me for more info.
Here's are some safe bets:
Performance Team Freight
Linens n Things
If you're smart you'll want to buy in now when the market is soaring. My advisor said invest in everything because there's virtually no risk. Well I bet you're saying it's easy for you to say put yours moneyk where your mouth is! Well, I personally just invested 6,000 dollars and bought a thousand shares of Hollywood Video (safe bet because everyone needs Tapes) and 400 shares of Sharper Image (safe bet because they have quirky cool gifts). I think they will both be good picks! If you do invest your money, I hope that everyone is having a fun day (because that's how they get you)!
So if you need some guaranteed extra cash play the stocks!
And remember: Everyone Wins at Stocks!